Pick Your Battles

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Do you have a relationship in your life that is strained and driving you nuts? Maybe a spouse, child, co-worker or sibling is grating on your last nerve and just about everything they do is inconsiderate, wrong or incompetent. Do you find yourself being constantly critical of their words and actions? Do you watch them closely for the next screw-up?

One of the biggest mistakes we tend to make is making a big deal out of things that should remain small things. I guess it’s human nature to stand for what we think is “right” regardless of its significance (or insignificance) to the overall health and wellness of the relationship. In the wise words of Dr. Phil, “Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?”

The solution: Be wise and selective about the issues you’re willing to fight for. If they are going to advance or protect the relationship, by all means, take a stand. On the other hand if you’re merely trying to protect your ego, follow the advice of Queen Elsa from Frozen and “Let it go!”

Everyone needs positive affirmations. So if it truly is someone you love or it is an important relationship in your life, be sure to dole out a positive and encouraging word for every criticism you dole out. No relationship can survive on constant criticism alone.

You reap what you sew in relationships. You can choose to speak affirmation and respect or you can be critical and constantly ready to pounce. But one will return a bountiful harvest of loving affections and the other will simply kill the crop.

Pick your battles!

Nicie Lee
Christian Life Coach
http://www.NicieLee.com

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Resolutions

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RESOLUTION
There’s something about the start of a New Year that motivates people to resolve to change some part of their life.

Resolve: To DECIDE FIRMLY on a course of action.

Making a decision starts with the brain. We’ve all heard that writing specific resolutions and putting them somewhere visible will improve the likelihood of success. I tend to agree with that approach because it serves as a visible reminder to our brain that we resolved (decided firmly) to make an important change.

But once your brain firmly decides to make a change, the actual change itself has to occur in your heart. Think about it, it’s hard for us to deny whatever our heart desires whether it’s good or bad for us. Our brain tells us one thing (right, wrong, good, bad), but our heart…. Well our heart wants what our heart wants and it usually controls our ultimate behavior and actions. A change of heart (not just a decision in the brain) is where our life can transform into something new.

So somewhere along the way, we have to connect our brain’s decisions to the transformation of our heart’s desires. So how do we connect our mind and heart?

We start with our Spirit!

Spirit: The nonphysical part of a person that is the seat of emotions and character; the soul.

There’s several practical ways to ignite your spirit, but it almost always starts with a prayer. Pray to God to know your resolutions and to help you achieve transformation. With God for you, who or what can be against you? No one! Nothing! You can do ALL THINGS through Christ who strengthens you.

So let’s recap:
1. Resolve (decide firmly) with your brain.
2. Write your specific resolution on a notecard or piece of paper and place it before you.
3. Announce to God your specific resolutions and pray for Him to: bless your resolutions, walk alongside you to help you achieve your resolutions, and to change your heart. (This ignites the Spirit!)
4. Place the written resolutions in a place where you can see it and read it daily (be intentional about reading it).
5. Repeat the prayer daily. This can be a quick prayer, but never cease in praying because it keeps God on your side.
6. Witness the transformation of your heart and the successful achievement of what you resolve to do in your life.

There’s so much more you can do to ignite your spirit to move in your life. But that would occupy the space of a book rather than a lengthy fb post!

Happy New Year! May you achieve all that you resolve to achieve in 2015.

Nicie Lee
Christian Life Coach
www.NicieLee.com

FREE 30-MIN CONSULTATIONS FOR THE NEW YEAR.

Praying to “SEE”?

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/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/d4b/60790396/files/2014/12/img_3701.jpgWe often pray for answers or a sign about what we should do in certain situations and then we stall for lack of certainty; stuck hopelessly in “what ifs” that may lead to bad outcomes. We cannot see the future with confidence, therefore we hesitate and doubt our decisions.

Faith is believing in Him before we can “SEE”.

Someone once described faith to me as standing between the two glass panels of life; one clear glass panel behind you and one opaque panel in front of you.

While we can clearly see behind us, the panel will not allow us to go back to where we were. Therefore, our Lord does not want us to spend fruitless energy looking backwards. We must learn from what we see behind us and we must leave it there and move forward.

He also does not want us frozen in our current situation because we fear what we can’t yet see in front of us. We do not know what lurks on the other side of the opaque panel. But we are not meant to see the future; only God knows the future.

Maybe we are praying for the wrong thing when we pray to “see”. Perhaps our prayer simply needs to be an invitation? He longs for us to invite Him into our situations. And then He wants us to trust Him and take steps forward in confident faith that He is with us at all times.

When you invite God into your situation, He will not forsake you. He will prosper you.

Faith:
Invite Him in.
Trust Him.
Confidently move forward.
Then see His good works.

Matthew 9:29
Thereupon, he touched their eyes, and said, Your faith shall not be disappointed.

Nicie Lee
Christian Life Coach
http://www.NicieLee.com
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From The Mouth of Babes

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My 11-yr old daughter has learned about two societal norms this week that have really disturbed her. She heard the word abortion and asked what it meant. And she learned about legalized marijuana in some states. When I explained them to her, she had a visceral reaction with a crinkled brow face.

She apparently has been pondering these issues because tonight she asked out of the blue, “Mom, can a Christian not tell anyone they are Christian and run for Governor or President? I don’t mean lie, but just not say anything. And then when they get elected, do a lot of things with other Christians to help our country not be so bad?”

Such a profound statement from a young girl. It says a lot about a lot of things.

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If I put up with that…. Does that make me a doormat?

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IMG_2951.PNGIf anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. -Matthew 5:39 NIV

People that deliver insults expect an insult in return. It is unnatural to withhold an insult for an insult; it requires humility and an intentional decision to control your reactive anger. But doing so is a reflection of the indwelling of Jesus and sets you apart from the rest. In other words, if you can respond with love instead of hatred or anger, you might grab someone’s attention and have a chance to share the gospel; if not verbally, through your actions.

“Turn to them the other cheek” does not mean you must be a total pacifist under every circumstance; it only pertains to personal offenses, such as an offense to one’s dignity. For example, it does not mean that anyone should tolerate abuse, criminal offenses, acts of violence, nor acts of military aggression.

It takes courage and Christ-like love to turn the other cheek. Righteous peace (not victimization) is found in humility. And that type of peace is far better than being consumed by the toxicity of ego and vengeance. Turning the other cheek does not make you a doormat, it is the ultimate sign of strength and spiritual health.

http://www.NicieLee.com
Christian Life Coach

Alone and Worried?

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Comfort and unwavering love is waiting for you in your faith. Fear or Faith? No matter your circumstances, the decision is always yours.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16 NIV)

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him. (1 John 5:14-15 NIV)

I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.” (Genesis 28:15 NIV)

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

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http://www.NicieLee.com

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